What really happen

Owh yes I have recently went crazy on Facebook and post and angry status on an ex-colleague. Well after that she contacted me and explained about the handbag and the car. The thing is, it's not just that. 

 

It began with the facial wash. I remembered a very long time ago, I showed her what type of facial wash I was using and a couple months after that she proudly showed me that she is using the exact same facial wash. I did not get angry or anything I was just thinking that it's kind of weird.

 

Then, I realized that there were other small things like when she first join the company, she is the kind of girl who wears flat shoes and during that time I was crazy with wedges and hills. There were this particular wedges that is freakishly high that even my boss commented on it. Then, you know what? A couple of weeks later she shows up with similar design of wedges.  At that moment, I still tend to ignore all those little things that she does.

 

Tension starts to build when I bought a new phone. It was just a blackberry. I am the kind of person who hates the attention when I have a new stuff, I even take the step of having the same ringtone as my old phone so that people won't notice. Guess what?? A couple of weeks after that, when I arrived in the office in the morning, she was proudly waving her phone to me showing that she has also bought a blackberry. How about that? The odds of having the same brand of cell phone is quite high too, but I still let it pass. 

 

The tip of the iceberg was, when one day I felt like having an Ikea meatballs for lunch and I dragged her all the way to Ikea. After the meal, we decided to look around inside the Ikea to check out any new products. Then, I saw those pink document tray that finally they re-stock. I told her I always wanted it but it was always out of stock, and now when there are abundant of them, I do not have the budget. YOU KNOW WHAT? Less than a week after the occasion, she showed up in the office with the exact same tray in pink? I was angry like mad! You might think that, "it's just a document tray, what is the big deal?" The issue is, since it's an unimportant thing and greatly available in stationary store, why does she has to buy that particular tray with the same exact colour? If she really needs it, she can get any other color isn't it? If it's something like a house for example, and she bought the same exact house that I have been eyeing for, I am sure I won't get angry because in terms of odd item like a house or a car, it's not easy to get a great bargain and the odd of owning the exact same item is higher. The problem is now is that its a common thing, but why does she has to buy the one that I wanted? I ends up not buying it at all and used the common type provided by the company. 

 

After that, there were the make-up craze I had when I started wearing full make up and all and then she decided to put on make up too but to the extend of having her make-up bag on her side and always ready for her to touch up. That is just plain annoying. 

 

Then the car, I was not angry but just a little bit annoyed but as I mentioned before, it is understandable that the odds of driving the same car is quite high. So, I have no complaints about that. I changed to a new phone and then she changed too to the same brand is also not a big problem to me.

 

The handbag thing was the last thing I can bare. She said that the husband bought for her and etc, came to me explaining and all saying that it's not her money. Well, money is not the problem, the problem is using the exact same handbag. How bout the handbag before that? It look similar with another colleague, did her fiancee bought her that too? All of the stuff before this? Her family bought for her?? Well she is just a very annoying person and I don't feel guilty at all with that status. I didn't mention her name and if she thinks she's innocent why does she has to act guilty?

Halal Wonton Noodles in Johor Bahru/UTM Skudai

I have never tasted any wonton noodles in my life before because this is a Chinese Delicacy and it's normally non-halal here in Malaysia. But when I studied in UTM Skudai, I had the opportunity to find a Muslim stall selling wonton noodles. The exact location is in the cafeteria located at K11. The name of the stall is OK Wantan Mee. The stall is owned by a pair of husband and wife and they will make you feel like home with their fantastic treatment. For a regular like me, the wife can predict what I will order even before I said anything.

They serve the dry version as well as the soup version. They also have variety of noodles to choose, from the normal wantan noodles, ramen noodles or even "Raja" noodles. Just ask the owner for the perfect noodles to pair with the kind of serving you desire (dry version or soup version).

They also serve an out of this world Chicken Rice with an affordable price. During the month of Ramadhan, they provide delivery service for "sahur" specially for the students staying in "Kolej 11".

If you are not a UTM student but you wish to taste this great meal, you can visit their other outlet located at Angsana shopping mall food court. It's just 2 stalls away from the "Rojak Asma" stall. They serve the same menu as in UTM except  this outlet do not serve chicken rice. Since UTM is having their semester break and as an ex-student who do not have total access to the university compound, I get to opportunity to relive memories during my study years last weekend where I visited the Angsana outlet and get my hands on a bowl of "raja" noodles in wonton soup. It is as tasty as ever and worth every penny.

If you are a student in UTM and never heard about this stall, go on an pay a visit at K11 cafe or if you are planning to visit Johor Bahru, don't forget to make a stop at Plaza Angsana for this great food!

It's all about perspective

The definition of perspective that I got out of Google is "a particular attitude toward or way of regarding something; a point of view." Trust me, for common people like me, I would only think this word only applicable for some art sculpture or painting on how you look at and how you would define those art works. 

Well get this, it's applicable on your daily life too! Here's a simple example, 

A couple of days ago I was hanging out with the Human Resource personnel, suddenly, she mentioned my colleague's name and ask me to show her which one is this person. After pointing her to the right direction, then, I asked her "what's up?". Well, for a typical hr person, they would keep everything as a secret, so, she just said "Nothing". 

As a normal human being (normal I guess), I started to think that maybe my colleague is going to get a raise or she gets promoted. I can't help but feeling a little bit jealous about it. After that, I went on straight to my colleague with the "great" news (based on my perspective that she's getting a raise or promotion....it's great isn't it?). Then I told her that the hr personnel is looking for her, guess what pops out of her mouth??? "Why is she looking for me?? Did I do anything wrong??" I just smiled at her and told her that it's all about perspective, the hr people might be looking for her to give something nice like a raise or a promotion, instead she went on a look on the negative part of it. 

How I would conclude the situation would be, your perspective on a certain occasion is based on which shoes are you in. In my case, I was the "jealous colleague", hence, I started to think that she's getting all the great things that I don't think I can ever get. For her on the other hand, she can't help but feeling guilty maybe due to some small mistakes she had done before. Anyhow, it's important that you need to have a correct perspective on any situation, so that you won't feel sad or stress about it later. Imagine being in my friend's shoes, she might still feels guilty and cannot stop thinking about why is that hr person looking for her. In order to have peace of mind, look everything in the positive perspective, then you can think properly if you ever stuck in a bad situation.

I believe in no such thing as racism in Malaysia!

Hello! Thanks to my boss whom I always complaint about on this blog, he suggested that I write any "logical" input I have on daily basis. Hence, here I am posting a blog the moment I reach home, still in my office attire.

I believe all those racist issue were raised because people are just purposely trying to cause chaos. Apparently, even after they talk about it on almost daily basis, none of us are affected by it. My first example is of what had just occurred to me a couple of minutes ago. Here's the story:

I was walking towards my apartment from the car park, when I was about to cross the road, there was an Indian girl who ALMOST run over me with her bicycle (Please notice the word "almost", it didn't happen okay!). In order to avoid the accident, I just had to stop walking and let her pass through since she seemed unable to control her bike. Even though, nothing happened and no one gets hurt, she still said "Maaf", and I ended up giving her a smile without being angry at all.

Furthermore, back in my secondary school, more than half of the students in my class are non-Malays and we had no problem at all. I remembered going to the mall for a movie with them, and there was even once, we had a trip and I stayed in a room with two Indian girls and a Chinese girl. We had so much fun as if nothing divide us.

To conclude, if you were ever being annoyed with people from other race and started thinking "Typical Chinese/Indian/Malay", think back again, have you ever met people of your race that has a bad attitude as the people from the other race that you are annoyed with? I believe the answer would be YES. Then, you will realize, it's not about the race, it's all about that person itself that cannot behave properly.

Luaskan Kuasa, Menaungkan kami....

Hey all!

In the spirit of JDT masuk ke final piala FA, so, saya  bersemangat dan berbangga menjadi orang Johor!

Teringat kepada kutukan rakan sekerja yang tidak puas hati dengan term yang digunakan oleh berita channel berapa entah tentang perlawanan separuh akhir dengan Pahang yang ditunda. Katanya pembaca berita menggunakan terma "bangsa Johor" berulang kali dimana rakan-rakan saya merasakan "Adakah korang ni bukan melayu dan mempunyai bangsa sendiri?". Well, my respond at that very moment was "**cricket sound**"....hihi........well I refuse to create any provocation and I really cherish the friendship that we have.

Tapi, what I want to say is. Yes! we are our own bangsa whereby, the poem below can explain everything about "bangsa johor"
Furthermore, the poem also give a reminder to all JDT fan for the final. Hope to see you guys at the stadium on the 29th June!

MELAYU JOHOR

Melayu Johor

telah terlalu banyak kita kehilangan

sawah ladang bertukar tangan

pekan dan bandar kita menumpang

Teluk Belanga entah ke mana

yang tinggal hanyalah pakaian

sedarah sedaging hampir hilang

yang ada hanyalah setulang

Selat Tebrau kian sempit

hati rindu jauh tergamit.

Di Johor,

Jawa itu Melayu

Bugis itu Melayu

Banjar itu Melayu

Minangkabau memang Melayu

Aceh dan Siak adalah Melayu

Jakun dan Sakai lebih Melayu

Arab dan Turki pekat Melayu

Mamak dan Malbari jadi Melayu

malah Muallaf bertakrif Melayu.

Melayu itu maknanya bijaksana

"jika menipu pun bersopan"

kurang ajarnya tetap bersantun

dajalnya cukup selamba

budi bahasa jangan dikira

beraninya cukup benar

tunduk bila bersalah

"lembutnya cukup jantan"

setia sampai ke kubur

biar mati adat jangan mati sahabat.

Anak Johor,

luka di Tanjung Putri

parutnya di Parit Raja

muka biar berseri

mulut biar berbahasa.

Berkelahilah cara Melayu

menikam dengan pantun

menyanggah dalam senyum

marahnya dalam tertawa

merendah bukan menyembah

meninggi bukan melonjak.

Watak Melayu menolak permusuhan

jiwa Melayu mengangkat persahabatan

kasih sayang kekeluargaan

ringan tulang saling bertolongan

jujur memaafkan, ikhlas memberikan.

Berdamailah cara Melayu

silaturahim yang murni

di mulut sama di hati

maaf senantiasa bersahut

tangan dihulur bersambut

luka pun tidak lagi berparut.

Melayu Johor saudaraku yang dikasihi,

dalam kekeruhan ini carilah perdamaian

sifat terpuji setiap insan.

Bermuafakat supaya berkat

bersaudara dunia akhirat

berikhtiar dengan tabah

kepada Allah berserah.

USMAN AWANG

1988

My birthday!

Hey ho it's my birthday!

Well my family celebrated it with a whole loads of food last night with an awesome cake to top it off! Durian cheese cake! My breath still smells like durian at this very moment!

It has been a fun day for me! Woke up with a lot of last night mess in the kitchen in my grandmother's place, hence I had to help my parents clean it all up before making my way back to my house here in USJ! All the cleaning activity really worn me out and I was planning to take a nap and just hang out with my family till noon before making my way back to USJ, then, I suddenly remember that I promised to my students to organize a class tonight. Then I just went on and get ready to pack my stuff for my trip back to KL! yeay!

With all of the lamb, chicken and fishes I had for dinner last night that is making my throat all dry in the morning, I spent the whole time packing my stuff with one of my hand holding a glass of water. In summary, I drank a lot of water this morning before my trip!

During my trip, I stopped at the first petrol station I encountered and bought a bottle of mineral water to quench my never ending thirst and a can of red bull to keep me energize while driving. You can imagine with the amount of water I have been drinking the whole morning complete with the bottle of mineral water I just bought, I had to stop for the ladies at the first R&R in Melacca which was less than an hour from the moment I begin my journey.

After emptying my "tank" then I continue my lonely journey back to USJ with the company of a can of redbull! And.....here comes the effect of loads of caffein complete with loads of water.... The moment I finished the can of the energy drink I had a little feeling that I need to go to the ladies again!

I was like "WTF" and to make things more interesting, the traffic had started to become heavy from Ayer Keroh onwards... Yet, my smart little brain told myself that we'll make a stop in Dengkil, by then, the congestion will subside and less people at the R&R and I can empty my tank comfortably. But unfortunately, as the traffic is getting heavier every second and the rate of my tanks going full is increasing, I decided to reduce the distance. I promised myself that the next stop will be the R&R in Seremban instead. But apparently God really want to test me and the traffic was almost at stand still and my palms starts to sweat and I just cannot sit still! I felt like my bladder was about to burst!

To avoid any future health problem I decided to take the next exit which was Port Dickson, to empty my tank. The moment I was at the toll gate, I asked the lady working there, "is there any toilet at this exit?" with a happy face she answered my question, "there's no toilet here"

I felt like committing suicide at that very moment!

Then I decided to just drive heading to Seremban and find any petrol station regardless of the cleanliness. After driving for quite a while, I found a BHP somewhere under a flyover and luckily the ladies is clean even though it's an old building. It was a huge relief and I decided to continue my journey without turning back to enter the highway with the same exit I took Instead, I was aiming to enter the highway through the Seremban exit. 

But... since I have no idea where I was, I felt lost! I have never drove in Seremban and I don't know my way around! I just drive and drive until I was at the Seremban city center and from there I went on and looking for the green highway signboard. Luckily I found the right exit which was the Seremban exit and I just have to go through the heavy traffic for a couple more minutes before I exit on to the ELITE highway which there was no congestion at all.

Well, it was an exciting day for me and now I am just tired, luckily the tuition class was canceled and now I am just sitting at home doing nothing. Yeay!

A piece of advice, don't drink too much water before going into a long journey alone! ahaha!

Nasi ayam from raw material!

Owh yes! I am all excited to make chicken rice! found an awsome recipe online and I am going to practice it today after work for dinner with my love one! The recipe I found is:

Bahan-bahan ( 6-8 orang )

Untuk rebus
-1 ekor ayam dipotong ikut suka besarnya (x potong pun boleh)
- 2 ulas bawang putih
- 2sm halia yg diketuk
Untuk perap
>1 sudu besar kicap pekat
>1 sudu besar sos tiram
>1cm halia
>2 ulas bawang putih
>sedikit kicap cair
Untuk nasi
- 5cwn beras
- 3 sudu besar butter
- 1cm halia- ditumbuk
- 4 ulas bawang putih -ditumbuk
- air rebusan ayam tadi secukupnya
- sedikit garam.
Bahan sos
> 5biji cili merah
> 5 ulas bawang putih
> 2cm halia
> 1 sudu teh cuka, garam, gula
> 1/2 cawan air
Untuk sup
@lebihan air rebusan ayam
@1 biji bawang besar kisar
@rempah sup
@garam
@daun sup yg dihiris.

Cara-cara

1. Ayam dipotong ikut suka besarnya (x potong pun boleh)..bersihkan dan di lumur dengan 2 ulas bawang putih yg ditumbuk dan 2sm halia yg diketuk..dan rebus hingga empuk
2. Toskan ayam dan perap dengan bahan-bahan untuk perap selama 15-20min. Goreng hingga garing.
3. Basuh beras dan toskan. Panaskan butter, tumis halia dan bawang putih hingga garing. masukkan beras, terbit bau, masukkan air rebusan ayam secukupnya dan garam. Masak seperti biasa.
4. Untuk sos-blendkan semua bahan diatas. boleh ditambah tomato sos/sos cili jika suka. Boleh juga dimasak sebentar (jika suka)
5. Untuk sup- air rebusan ayam didihkan bersama bawang besar, rempah sup, garam dan daun sup tadi. 

Well, here's the link where I found the recipe Nasi Ayam Special

I hope I have enough time to cook before my boyfriend comes home from work! Owh please!

Resam Dunia - P Ramlee

I heard this song on the radio 2 days ago when I was flipping through the radio channels. Now I am crazy about it. The song is just talking bout LIFE! I don't think that there's any other song as sincere as this song.

Check out each and every words of this song and you will understand......

Dunia ini hanya palsu
Manusia berdusta
Kebanyakan suka menipu
Gemar membuat dosa

Dunia penuh dengan noda
Dunia penuh dosa
Kebanyakan tipu dan daya
Mengikut nafsu murka

Ada pula yang salah sangka
Banyak yang salah terka
Pasir disangka intan
Batu disangka berlian

Siapa itu
Cuba terka

Siapakah itukah gerangan
Berlagu dan berdendang
Suara merdu dan menawan
Membikin hatiku girang

Kalau ada bunga di taman
Berseri warna kuning
Apa guna ke hutan
Sekuntum boleh disunting

Mari sini
Jangan marah

Begitulah resam dunia
Tidak kekal selamanya
Hati-hati sebelum kena
Agar tiada terpedaya.

Double shot ABB subsidized cheap espresso bean latte!

I wanted to post something online, but I am very sure that it's too long to be tweeted. Then I decided to post it on facebook! Half way typing the status, then I started to think....only lame people still post what they think on facebook status. Suddenly my light bulb shines!!! *tingggg*. I am going to blog about it!!!!!!!

Let me begin.......

Do you remember P Ramlee's movie "Labu Labi"???

There's this one scene where Labu chanted "nak cari kayu, nak cari kayu" before going to bed.

Now, it's almost 1 a.m. and all I can think is "nak pergi site visit, nak pergi site visit".

I turn and I turn, but I still cannot shut my eyes. I tried my best to figure out why on earth I am all excited about this site visit until I can't force myself to sleep???

The site is only in Texas Instrument in Ampang. It's not like a very fancy place that I would have some time to include a short shopping session.

Then when I broaden my "thinking radius" (does this word even exist? If it doesn't I should patent it! :-P), I realized I drank a cup of coffee this afternoon. That's why my brain is telling me to sleep now but my eyelids are wide open!!!

What's in my coffee?

1. Double shot espresso (made out of cheap espresso beans subsidized by ABB)
2. 4 teaspoon of coffeemate
3. 1 teaspoon of sugar!

The first ingredient is the reason why I am being this energetic and posting a blog at 1 am!


This effect is quite unusual since I have been drinking this coffee for more than a year now, but why am I having this "caffeine kick" (I don't this think this word exist too! I just created it. It means, being extra energetic due to too much coffee in your body) right now? I need to sleep! I don't want to be sleepy tomorrow morning in front of the client!!!

I don't want to seem like I am not interested in their cap bank issue!!! (in reality I don't give a shit on the issue, medium voltage products are just making me sleepy....zZzZzZzZ....) Hence, please go to sleep my dear eyes........My brain can't function anymore, it's time for it to shut down for a couple of hours..

Goodnight to all of you reading this post. I think all of you should go to bed too. (Yes you, the one thinking, "apa si Wani merepek ni???")

Gutte Nacht!!! XOXOXO

I believe in serendipity!

Well, after 11 years the movie serendipity had released, I only get the chance to watch it last week! How pathetic! Well, at the end of the movie I believe that it's a fairytale and it won't happen in real life!

Well, let me start the story by telling you a history. Back then when I was a student, I took a subject called separation and in order to complete it I have to attend the laboratory class too. During this lab. class I was in a group of all girls except for one guy who I don't find familiar at all. He is not my coursemate or even from the same batch as I am. He is a senior and I do not know for what reason he had to take that class that semester. Anyway during the class I had time to ask about his background because I found him attractive! (Muka macho melayu giteww! Hotsss!) Well there's nothing happen after that because I don't think he would find a plain girl like me attractive. But at that moment I was really in to him!

Then I moved on with my life until a couple of days ago. It struck me "what ever happen to that guy ea?".

Then I started reminisce about him, thinking bout his stories of having a Frech couple adopt him as their son, he sings in the choir, and he even like to see the musical theater. Then the feeling just brushed off and I resume with my life.

BUT THEN!!!!!!!!!

Something weird happen, Fatimah and I went to the World Gas Convention today and guess who I bumped into at the convention???

It's "abang lab separation"!!!!!!!!!!

I was staring at this guy that I found attractive because I was thinking, "I've seen this guy before, but I couldn't recall where". He even noticed that I was staring at him, and then it struck me! Yes!!!! He is my abang lab separation!

At first I was thinking to ignore his existence because I was embarrassed by the fact that I stared at him earlier. So I continue going around the hall. Then, Fatimah and I went to Shell's booth and we were asked to join a quiz session. We were happy to join it, and guess who else join it??

It's "abang lab seperation"!!!!

Well at the end of the session, I was so determined to go to him and say "hi". But after I returned the "remote thingy", I looked around and he was gone!

I told Fatimah that I want to look for him and it was SERENDIPITY that had just occur. But she says it's not! Well she challenged me, if I ends up marrying "abang lab separation" she will sponsor my wedding!

Now I am more than determine to find him! If the serendipity is so strong! We might meet in the end just like in the movie! Just wait and see, I really hope I will get my free wedding! 

First experience to be in Kuching, Sarawak

I am a 25 year old Malaysian who has never been to Kuching Sarawak. This is suppose to be a great experience for me.

Well initially it was great, besides the fact that the client screamed at me once we arrived at the airport. It was kind of bad and it makes me grumpy but..... I had a great lunch and it changed my mood altogether. Well as usual, food can make you happy. I had prawns, fish and some vegetables that I can't find it in the peninsular. I also had a great appetizer which is sea cucumber soup. Yummeh!!

Then we went to the hotel and i get to have a great view from my room with huge beds! It is so awsome!

Then, in the afternoon when it was not so hot. I took a walk along the river. It was nice in the beginning because the weather is great and the view are nice.

I even saw a very nice restaurant named James Brooke cafe. I feel like having dinner there when I saw it.

After having such a great time walking all by myself and enjoying the view, then, I notice that there's someone has been walking behind me for quite sometimes. I hold my handbag tightly because I was scared of pick pocket. Then suddenly I heard a voice from behind.

"Where are you going? Why are you walking alone? Are you going to see a friend?"

It was three questions asked at once and he speaks in Malay obviously, but I just translated it for you.

Well, during that moment I choose to ignore him. Then he called me "kak long" and ask me again "Are you going to meet someone?"

I was so scared and I just nodded my head

Then, he asked again. "Where are you going to meet that friend of yours?"

I just point somewhere ahead.

Then, he asked again "Why, you can't talk??"

And then I laughed and I finally said "Yeah, I am going to meet my friend somewhere over there" (well I keep it as general as possible since I am not meeting anyone)

At that moment, I was so scared then I informed my friends on What's App.

Then I heard the guy's voice again. He was guessing "Is that guy in the white shirt is your friend??"

Then I freaked out and call Fatimah. But unfortunately!!!!! Fatimah's phone was having a problem and I cannot talk to her. Then I had to call Poji to pretend that I am confirming an appointment. When I was talking to Pojie, that guy stops following me. After walking for a couple of minutes, I turned my head around and that guy was WAVING at me! HOW SCARY IS THAT??? Then I just leave a message to Pojiah, "if I don't send any message on what's app in an hour, then they will have to call the police!!!"

Well I took a different route to go back to the hotel and I even had time to do some shopping. When I reached the hotel I saw Michael Hedberg! That was the greatest view of all! I felt safe and we had dinner in front of the hotel, near the river. Once I have Michael around I felt all comfortable!

Now at this very moment, I am safe in my hotel room posting this blog!

That was a crazy experience! I really hope that it will not happen again during my next visit with Angeles!!

Principle VS Feelings

Well when it comes to my principle and my feelings are in a middle of a race, I am just confused who should I name as the winner.

The story is like this. I have been having this feeling towards a certain someone a very long time ago. But I have this principle of not going with it since it will cause a very bad consequence. Well it will kind of ruined my life all together. I have been preaching that it's a bad thing for quite some time and yet this feeling is telling me the opposite.

I used to be successfully putting this feeling aside because I was distracted. And yet, lately I have lost my distraction and now I realized that the distraction is not strong anymore, in fact it is the main reason drawing me closer to this person that I am not suppose to have feeling with.

I am trying my best to somehow thinking bout his negative side to fight with this feeling and yet I always ends up loosing. The attraction is so powerful and I do not know how to handle it anymore. I was so lucky at one point I was saved by living in denial with this attraction because he kind of proposing the idea of having something between us and I  didn't get it and pointing the conversation to a whole different direction. I only realized that he was proposing the idea until I saw his reaction with my respond to his question. Well, part of me I wish that he will propose the idea again and yet the other part of me really hope that he gives up with us and never proposing it again because it's a bad thing.

I still think that the whole relationship is a bad idea. How to overcome this feeling??? I need a new distraction because the old one is useless. Where can I find a new one? I need it fast!

Crazy little thing called love

I have a lot of male close friend...........some of them are married and I even know their wife. I just feel comfortable being friend with men because somehow most of my jokes are kind of "manly" and not many women will understand.

I can list all of them up, like Rezza who used to work in Protank, Pian, Hardi, then there's Daus from Matrikulasi in Tangkak and also from UTM like Abu and the rest. I also have a couple of friend here in ABB like Adly, Shahariman and all........



Anyway, perempuan ni cepat perasan. I always share my feelings and thoughts with them and pernah la at one point I felt like some of them had feelings towards me. But then now dah tua I am mature enough to understand that it's just plain friendship.


I still remember the feeling of "perasaan" that I had towards these friends.........it's different. It felt like puppy love and it came right after we get close (like after 1-2 months being friends), and after that the feelings kind of gone missing. Everything get back to normal

But then. now I have this friend. We've been friend for almost a year. I think that he is the closest of them all because he knows my "deepest darkest" secret and he accepts me as it is. I used to had a crush on him but I have got over it since he has a very weird view of a woman and sometimes he an ass! Nevertheless, lately, there are times when we had a conversation, and I kinda "perasan je lebih" that we are "staring" at each others eyes very deeply as in we care about each other.

Our first staring session occur a very long time ago where he ends up with a question "u pakai contact lense ke" which I had been made to understand that he was just admiring my eyes and not related to any feelings at all.

Then the second session was when he gave me a lecture on "you need to change your attitude in order to get a boyfriend". He was about to share what he was lecturing me about with a colleague, when there's this other guy walk in to the location and then, my friend stares deep into my eyes and getting the message from me that "no, don't share it with him, this conversation is private between us".

Our third staring session is two days ago, we were talking and he stared at me, I was also staring at him, and at the beginning of posting this blog I was very sure that there were feelings involved during this third session. But, by now, I kind of have come to realize that he was staring at me because he was just making sure that he had told me everything and no other important details that he had accidentally left out.

Hence, I can conclude this post with, sebenarnya tak ada apa-apa pun.....I je yang perasan...........Wakakakakak!

First time receiving a New Year's card!

I have never received any greetings card besides "kad raya" my entire life! Today, on the 20th of December 2011........I received a new year's greeting card!!!

It's kinda ugly and not interesting at all but since it's the first card I have ever received I kind of appreciate it.

Furthermore, this card has been sent from an extremely good looking man all the way from Switzerland! He's married though! Darn.........

But it's awsome tht he remembers me! I kind of felt guilty for not sending him any Christmas greetings card. Nevertheless, my father advised me to give him something during my visit to Switzerland........but tak tau nak kasi apa kt Mat Salleh tu ea?

Anyhow, something funny bout this card is that there is a greeting within the card in a language I don't even know what. Fortunately there's a translation underneath it. The thing is, when the greeting is in tht language, it is a very long speech....However, when it is translated in english..........tinggal one short line je.........pelik? Hurm.......

I am extremely happy to receive this card and I can't wait to receive any other greetings card from any of my principal from all over the world!

I wish that the real life is as easy as Facebook

Do you notice how facebook is making relationship between human being much more easier?

If you want to say "hi" to someone and not saying it, just poke them. You also do not have to actually hurt that person by actually poking them. Isn't that awsome??

Back then when you want to declare your relationship with your boyfriend or girlfriend, you must sit and talk to them and the boyfriend will actually propose and mentioned the word "will you be my girlfriend?". Then the girl would answer yes and this will happen face to face. Nowadays, with the help of facebook, just request for a change on your status, then if the girl accept it, your friends and her friend will know that both of you are in a relationship..........it's tht easy! If the girl decides to say "no", then she just have to reject it and she won't directly humiliate the guy........

Wanna know why am I talking bout facebook?

Well I have this friend that I really wish I can unfriend easily just by clicking an icon, just like in facebook.

Of course I can literally click unfriend on tht person name on facebook right now, but, the real life relationship will be ruined too. The thing is, it's not like I want to create an issue with that person or anything. I just wish I can unfriend that person and resume my life like that person had never existed. It's kinda mean, but I personally prefer it to be that way. I have tried the real life way by creating a gap, but then it created a speculation like I have some issue with that person when actually I don't.

I just think that I have been living my life for 24 years without that person and I want to continue it to be that way. I don't want anybody to come to me and say that I am mean or something. I am not!

I have never ended a friendship before, this is the first time I made a decision to end one. (Although someone had ended her relationship with me, but I was not the one who initiate the idea, so I still consider that this is the first time). This decision was not made as a punishment to anyone. I just think it's better this way.

I really wish that our life will resume like it used to be when we didn't know each other.

I don't want to hate tht person and tht person should not hate me too since we "don't know each other". I just want to act natural and still put on a smile when we walk pass by each other, but I don't want to spend time like we use to............

Life would be much easier if it's exactly like facebook........

Late night love song

I was driving back from work and I decided to tune in to Red fm for some late night love song.

As I was approaching my house, they played this song:

As I was listening to it, I was thinking that each and every single words from this song is so true.

We should never keep inside any kind of feeling we have towards a certain someone. I should've told him before he left.

For once, I thought that I might have gotten over him. This song remind me of him and the feeling I am having right now.

I bet this is the reason I have been very emotional lately....it's because "I miss everything about him"...

I can't look at him walking down the hall to his cubicle anymore..........no more curi2 tengok while hanging out at a friend's cubicle. Well, I have to move on........I really wish I don't have to find a new job again...... penat la tiap2 tahun pindah......... hurm.......

Cetusan hati dan dedikasi *ouch*

Hello! I am just seeking for advise...

These couple of days, I've been feeling empty. I have lost focus at work and I have been screwing up so bad. There are thing's I have under quoted thousands of ringgit.

To tell you the truth, I have lost my passion at work. Is this a sign?

I have worked in my previous company for 8 months and then I started looking for another job. Now, after six months here, I started to feel empty just like what I felt in the old company.

The last time I get bored, I decided to update my resume and pass it around. Then, I landed on my current job.

Like what I have repeatedly mentioned in the previous posts, even my current boss initially hesitated to hire me since he thinks that I have the potential to jump around so soon.

I've tried to convince him that I won't.

But this last couple of months, I been paying attention on emails sent by Lina from Jobstreet.

I feel bored with my current job and I think I have figured out that this is not what I want to be.

I used to be a proposal engineer in the previous company. Then I moved to this company thinking that I might be better off as a sales person because proposal engineer is so boring. Nevertheless, now I feel bored. I have realized that this is not what I want to be.

I can't figure out what I want in my life, but I am pretty sure I don't have any passion in what I am doing right now. I hate electrical subject since secondary school. But I am selling electrical stuff now. What is wrong with me???

I can't move to a new company again. It will ruin my resume altogether. What should I do now? Should I talk to my boss? I believe he has no intention of loosing me yet, because then, he will have to train the new people. But the thing is, I have no passion in my work anymore. I feel empty inside.

What if I go and have a long holiday? Will that help in a way? I don't know......

Can someone shed me some light and show me the right path?

Love-hate relationship

It's hard to have my boss as my best friend! Well hell yeah! I consider my boss as my best friend. He knows me so much to the extend of he knows me better than my parents.

Well,when he puts on his "boss" hat, I feel like nak picit dia sampai keluar tahi hijau! He's one of those annoying boss yg suruh i buat benda merepek mcm secretary and sometimes let me loose like a headless chicken to sort out big issue (to me it's big lah).

But when he puts on his best friend hat, we will have so much fun talking sampai sometimes i wish tak yah balik rumah, just lepak je dgn dia cerita sana sini. He understand me and from what ever he says about himself i think we are so alike.

Today he asked me to get a real boyfriend! He even allows me to do it during office hour...hehe...he puts it as while I am out doing sales I should meet ppl to get a boyfriend. Then i told him why I don't have one. It's because men are intimidated by my "over confident" attitude and my huge ego. Then he asked me to change lah my attitude. But I said I can't.

But when he used himself as an example, I can't help but agree that he has changed. This is based on a colleague's observation la...I pun tak tau dulu dia mcm mana.

Anyhow, he managed to make me think la...tapi mmg susah to change my attitude sbb I believe this is why he hires me at the first place.Tapi betul la wht my boss says, I need to think about my life and kene cari boyfriend and settle down someday. I have a good feeling about this sbb selalu nya apa dia cakap mesti I will automatically ikut...hoho...so I might change my attitude and try to be more girlish and loose the ego.

How to change myself pun I tak tau lagi.So, lama lagi la baru I dapat boyfriend. Hehe....

Radio

Muahahah! tak de sebab nak post but nak jugak post sesuatu! Lately I selalu sgt emotional. Now i know the contributing reason.  Bukan sebab I dah tua but single, tapi the songs they play on the radio! To begin with is jar of hearts christina perri. Mmg menambah emo kalau dgr lagu ni time driving, buat rasa nak marah je kt lelaki-lelaki gatal yg buat perempuan ni mcm tissue paper. Dah pakai buang, kalau nak lagi ambil yg baru.

Then datang pulak lagu California King bed, to me the definition lagu ni mcm she's loosing grip on a guy yg dulu she own entirely. Mmg buat diri ini emo jugak kalau dgr while driving. Buat rasa marah je kt lelaki yg cuba nak slowly tinggalkan perempuan dgn perlahan-lahan creating a gap. Then "poof" never heard from him anymore

And then, don't let me get started with Adele's someone like u! My first boyfriend dump me kata sebab nak concentrate on study tapi sekali a couple of months after that ada girlfriend pulak! Memang Adele help me define the feeling I had at that moment!

The last but not least! I want to tell all men out there yg used me as a door mat then dump me just like that, please listen to every single words Beyonce says in Best thing I never had

The sad part is that the radio constantly playing these songs! I have to listen to them and I ends up being emotional and stressed. They relate so much to my life and I hate them for telling the truth. I just think men need to listen to every song I listed above and treat your women better! Love them and don't ever let them feel wht those songs are talking about because it hurts a lot!

Dear Bill Rancic............

Bill and Giuliana Rancic

I was trying to have a life and stay away from Facebook. So, I ends up watching some tv. The only interesting show on tv was Giuliana and Rancic. Then, there I was with a bottle of junk food sitting on the couch all by myself watching the show.

Half way through the show I realized that Bill Rancic is just the PERFECT MAN ALIVE!!!!

He is very caring and patient! Unlike certain man I have encountered with!

Most men cannot put up with women that have to concentrate with their job and not on their men! But Bill is just different! He is pissed sometimes, but he still constantly calling Giuliana even though she didn't picks up and he still flew half way round the world just to be with her! That is just AWSOME!!!

There were time in the show where he himself is suppose to be busy traveling but he still find some time to give Giuliana a call! He never gives up even though she didn't picks up the call.

As a 24 years old single woman, I was in cloud 9 watching the show by wishing somehow I will ends up having a rich, hot, and caring husband like that, who would put up with my shit.


In conclusion thanks to E channel for giving me a target in life. "Find a good looking, caring and rich husband". This is achievable because Sazzy Falak has found one. I believe the Malaysian version of Bill Rancic would be Nazril Nash Idrus. Their job are the same and they are good looking men with celebrity wife!


Any how, by 3/4 of the show I realized that most of it is just acting and it's not a true reality tv. Hence, I changed the channel for my sister in law and go to my room and write this post.